Real Talk About Surviving a Breakup
A breakup can sting like a death in the family-- except that the person you thought you couldn’t live without is alive and well, possibly banging someone else. Put down the Ben & Jerry's and turn off the Adele. Like it or not, you've gotta get moving to move on. Your mental health depends on it. Consider this your game plan for getting from the minute your heart was stomped on to the day when you barely think about it at all.
Get out of bed. Give yourself a bedtime and set an alarm to wake up at a decent hour, even on the weekend. Your bed is for sleeping, not wallowing. There's no one to see there anyway. (Sorry.)
Ghost your ex. Decide how long you can realistically handle not talking/texting/chatting your ex. This is a stretch goal, so think big, but if you work together or have to be around each other for a legit reason it's not realistic to be MIA forever. Try to give yourself one or two solid weeks to deal with the hurt and pain before you have to see your ex's face again.
Don't stalk. It's tempting to analyze your ex's every tweet, insta, and post. But trying to decode what dumb GIF means is an anxiety-provoking waste of energy.
Get a giant tattoo on your back. Just kidding, definitely don't do that unless it was already scheduled. You're going to want to wait a few months before making any decisions that you'll have to live with your entire life.
Assemble your squad. Hopefully, your BFFs have already checked in on you, but when shit happens some people tend to lie low. That doesn't mean they don't want to be there for you, they just don't know how. Tell them what you need and everyone wins. Don't stop with your closest friends. This is an all-hands meeting and everyone, from your drinking buddies to office friends, can do something to help you take your mind off your swollen heart.
Pack your schedule. Join a rec sport league, take some night classes, and book lunches and drinks with people you've been meaning to catch-up. You probably don't feel like it, but do it anyway. It’s not about how you feel right now. It's how you will feel after you've spent your a newly single weeks getting back out there and participating in (maybe even enjoying) your life.
Write it all down. You can start with an e-mail detailing all of the ways your ex hurt you. Just don't send it. In fact, you don't even have to keep it.
See a therapist. If you're feeling sad, hopeless, or having symptoms of depression after a couple of weeks, it's a good idea to call in a pro. They can help you with the loss and figure out if there are other factors at play. For example, it could be that the breakup of your college relationship is also making you anxious about the next stage of your life.
Hang in there. You can do this.